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Making friends is an essential part of our social and emotional wellbeing. Friendships provide us with support, laughter, and a sense of belonging, making life more meaningful and enjoyable. However, for some individuals, making friends may not come naturally or can be a daunting task. Whether you are new to an area, shy, or just looking to expand your social circle, this guide will provide you with valuable tips and strategies on how to make friends. By following these suggestions, you will be well on your way to forming meaningful connections and building lasting friendships that will enrich your life.
This article was co-written by Trudi Griffin, LPC, MS. Trudi Griffin is a licensed professional counselor in Wisconsin. She received her MS in Clinical Mental Health Counseling from Marquette University in 2011.
There are 11 references cited in this article that you can view at the bottom of the page.
This article has been viewed 50,924 times.
It can be overwhelming at the thought of meeting new people and making friends, but with a little effort and determination to step out of your comfort zone, it’s easy to make new friends. Start by going out and finding places where you can connect with people, like a club or volunteer organization. Once you meet new people, take the time to get to know them and hang out with them.
Steps
Find a place to make friends
- Don’t forget that it’s rare that someone suddenly knocks on your door to get acquainted when you’re just sitting at home holding your laptop.
- If you have the opportunity to go out and meet people, don’t pass it up. For example, try getting involved in social activities at school or at work. If someone invites you to a party, don’t hesitate to accept!
- For example, you could join a school science club, marching band, knitting club, or other like-minded groups.
- If you enjoy playing an instrument or singing, try joining a band or choir. Sports teams are also a good choice if you’re into sports or just want to try something new and challenging!
- If you’re religious, you’ll find churches, temples, or other places of worship a great place to meet people, because you and the people who go there at least share the same religious beliefs. .
Tip: There are many resources online to help you find groups with similar interests. Try searching for a local Meetup.com group, or browse through Facebook groups and events in your area.
- For example, you could volunteer your time to a nursing home, hospital, animal shelter, or nonprofit.
- Search online or call local charities for volunteering opportunities.
- For example, if you are already a parent, you can find other parents whose children are in the same grade as your child. A playtime that you arrange for the kids will be a good opportunity to make new friends who share the same parenting role. [5] XResearch Sources
Take the first step
- You can talk to anyone: the employee at the store you shop at, the person sitting next to you on public transit, or the person standing in front of you in line. Don’t be too picky.
- Having a good attitude is always an advantage. You can start a conversation with people with a simple greeting like “Hi, how are you?” while passing them. When you say hello to people, you’ll appear more friendly, and people will usually be more than happy to respond. This is a great way to start communicating with people.
- Don’t roll your eyes, look bored, frown, or be apathetic. Try to avoid closed body language, such as crossing your arms or sitting alone in a corner.
Do you know? Imitating other people’s body language is a great way to socialize with them. When you’re talking to someone, subtly mimic their gestures and expressions. For example, if they smile and lean forward before talking to you, you should do the same. [8] XResearch Sources
- Comment on what’s going on around. The weather is a classic: “At least it doesn’t rain like it did last week!”
- Ask them for help: “Can you carry the boxes for me, if you’re not in a hurry?” or “Which of these do you think I should choose as a gift for mom?” Or, you can offer to help them, such as, “Do you need a hand in cleaning up?”
- Say compliments like, “That’s a nice car” or “I like your shoes.” However, you should avoid compliments that are too personal, as they can be uncomfortable.
- Follow up the compliment with a related question. For example, “Where did you buy these shoes? I also want to buy a pair like that.”
- People often like to talk about themselves and want to show how beautiful or talented they are. By listening more than you speak, you win people’s hearts.
- Show that you’re listening by nodding, maintaining eye contact, and responding to what the other person has to say with questions or comments.
- For example, if the other person talks about their profession, you might say something like, “Wow! How did you get into this profession?”
- Another way is to introduce yourself at the beginning of the conversation. For example, you might approach a new colleague with the greeting, “Hi, my name is Xuan. Actually, we haven’t met yet, but my office is near your office!”
- Remember the person’s name. If you show them you remember what the two of you talked about in the last meeting, the other person will know that you pay attention and really care about them.
- Try saying “I have to go, but if you ever want to join me for lunch or have a drink, let me give you my phone number/email address.”
- Your chances of seeing that person again are higher if you suggest a specific time and place. For example, you could say, “It was so much fun talking to you today! Shall we go to X’s this Saturday for coffee and muffins?”
- If it’s not convenient to meet the person in person, consider inviting them to an event with a group, such as a party or a movie.
- If you’re a member of a club, band, or other active group that you think they’re interested in, take this opportunity to give them your phone number or email address and invite them to join.
Maintain friendship
- One quality of a true friend is a willingness to sacrifice time and effort to help a friend in difficult times. Be nice to your friends.
- Be there for your friends when they need help, or when they need someone to comfort them when they’re sad.
Tip: Being loyal to you doesn’t mean always having to please them or let your friends take advantage of you. Set reasonable limits and say no as often as necessary for your own well-being.
- Once in a while, examine yourself to see if you’re the friend you want to have.
- On the other hand, you should also ask yourself if the other friend is doing their part correctly. If not, you need to have a sincere conversation with them (but don’t accuse or blame them all if the friendship doesn’t turn out the way you want it to).
- When you two have made an appointment to meet somewhere, don’t be late, and don’t miss your appointment.
- If an unexpected event prevents you from arriving on time or arriving, call as soon as you know it. Apologize to them and reschedule the meeting.
- Don’t make friends wait without warning; Obviously this is not a good way to start a friendship.
- Don’t act like you’re always the one with more interesting stories than others, or suddenly change the subject instead of following the flow of the conversation.
- When you talk, focus on what the other person is saying instead of worrying about what to say. Avoid interrupting and do not give advice unless asked.
- The key to being a soul mate is the ability to keep secrets. Never tell anyone else about what you have been told by your trusted friend.
- Don’t talk about your friends behind their backs or let them down when they trust you. You can also build trust by being honest and trustworthy.
- A little humor always keeps the conversation light and fun. Everyone wants to be around people who make them laugh.
- Friendship is happiest when we are comfortable being ourselves. Cherish your best qualities and let them shine when you’re around your friends, but don’t try to be someone you’re not in order to please them or impress them.
- Even if you don’t have time to chat or see each other, let your friend know that you still miss them by texting or stopping by to say hello.
- Maintaining friendships is not easy. You need to spend time with friends and share stories in your life. Respect their decisions and let them know yours too. Try to stay connected with your friends.
- Cherish the friends who have a positive influence on your life, and try to make a positive impact in their lives.
- Breaking up with a friend can be difficult, even if it’s an unhealthy relationship. If you have to end a friendship, give yourself time to grieve your loss.
Advice
- Always be kind and never judge others based on their appearance or because they are different from you. You could be missing out on great friendships if you don’t give everyone a chance.
- Don’t worry about what people think. Usually people just think about other things. Don’t imagine things that have no basis.
- If you’re not one to smile or make eye contact, don’t force yourself to smile awkwardly or look people in the eye if you don’t feel comfortable. Don’t force yourself to change or hide your nature, because not everyone can be extroverted. We each have a different way of expressing ourselves.
- Think carefully before you speak. Your friends may get hurt or upset when you speak recklessly.
- You don’t have to be a superstar to be a good friend. Try to be positive and friendly so that people feel comfortable and happy around you.
- If someone doesn’t think of you as closely as you think of them, think for a moment. Don’t force someone to like you.
- Get to know your new friend’s friends and family. This will open the door for you to make more friends!
- Believe in yourself! People are drawn to confidence, and it’s easier to approach people if you don’t always doubt yourself.
Warning
- Don’t be new and old. Good friendships are precious and hard to find, so try to stay in touch with old friends even as you make new friends.
- Trust your intuition. If someone makes you feel uncomfortable, there’s usually a reason. Don’t try to pursue friendships with people who make you uncomfortable.
- When you get to know someone, sometimes there will be conflicts. If you have a disagreement with a friend, don’t blame them or throw a tantrum. Give the person space and apologize for your mistake in the argument.
This article was co-written by Trudi Griffin, LPC, MS. Trudi Griffin is a licensed professional counselor in Wisconsin. She received her MS in Clinical Mental Health Counseling from Marquette University in 2011.
There are 11 references cited in this article that you can view at the bottom of the page.
This article has been viewed 50,924 times.
It can be overwhelming at the thought of meeting new people and making friends, but with a little effort and determination to step out of your comfort zone, it’s easy to make new friends. Start by going out and finding places where you can connect with people, like a club or volunteer organization. Once you meet new people, take the time to get to know them and hang out with them.
In conclusion, making friends is an essential part of our social well-being and personal growth. It requires genuine effort and a willingness to step out of our comfort zones. By following the steps mentioned above, such as being open-minded, engaging in shared interests, and being a good listener, we can increase our chances of making strong, lasting friendships. It is important to remember that friendships take time to develop and require patience and understanding. Building connections and nurturing friendships not only enrich our lives but also provide support and companionship during both joyous and challenging times. So, let us take the initiative, be kind, and make the effort to forge meaningful connections with others, as it will undoubtedly enhance our overall happiness and well-being.
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